#continuation The trash girl.
She chuckled sadly.
"She said you wouldn't believe it easily. She was right. Anyway, it's not in my place to tell you what happened. That's what the letter is for. Please open the envelope and read it."

My head started to feel light.
"Can we atleast find somewhere to sit? If this is what I think it is, I don't think I would be able to stop myself from collapsing."

"Yeah of course. I found a tree we could sit under on my way here", she said as she started to walk away.

I followed her with heavy steps until we got there.
Dropping my books on the bench she indicated that we sit on, I sat down myself.

Taking out the printing paper, I started to read slowly.
Halfway into the letter, I dropped it.

My fingers just couldn't hold it as they trembled greatly.
I felt a pat on my back.
My eyes met her sister's eyes as she gave me reassuring smiles and kept on patting my back soothingly.

She picked up the letter and placed it on my thighs.

"You're almost done reading. You can't stop now", she said quietly.

I nodded grimly and read the rest of the contents from my thighs.

Eyes shimmering with unshed tears, I asked the lady, "Can you...can you take me to the hospital?"

She nodded, "Sure. She wanted you to come too. She asked me to show you where those 'junks' eventually ended up."

I made a failed attempt to smile.

How could these ladies keep smiling???
My roommate and her mum knew she was going to leave the world that day, yet they smiled warmly at the porter???

Oh Lord.

We got into her car and headed for town as my mind replayed the contents of the letter.

"Baby Girl,
I am starting this by apologizing.
I am sorry.
I am sorry for not telling you I'd be leaving.
I am sorry we didn't get the chance to talk and be friends for real.
I am sorry I always shut you out. Believe me when I say I WANTED to be your friend. But then why would a vibrant girl like you want to have any real thing to do with a stage 4 lung cancer patient like me?

You once asked me why I kept on gathering those things without using them for myself. You'll find out why at the hospital I am going to give up the ghost.

I am currently typing this letter as I watch you sleep with a peaceful smile. You have all the time in the world baby girl.
Do not waste any second of it. I always wanted to experience how life in the university was like.
Even if I knew I wouldn't graduate. My parents would never get to see me wear a convocation gown. Atleast they got to see me in matriculation gown hehe.
You are one of the best things that has happened to me in my life.
You might wonder how or why. Here's why.
Even though you always thought I needed psychiatric help with my trash obsession, you never said that to me in the face.
Other roommates would have abandoned the room or filed several reports to the school and hostel management.
But you didn't do any of those.

You endured having to wake up every morning to a wall that had clean junk piled up against it.
I know you think I'm not aware you even made more space for me to keep my sacks by leaving out more than 50% of your personal space for me under the pretense that you didn't have a lot of belongings, when in reality your wardrobe was barely staying closed due to the large amount of things you kept in there.

You don't know this, but you've helped me live the last of my days doing something I loved. Making an impact on someone. (You'll understand better when you get to the hospital).

Many people call me names like trash girl and other sinister descriptions.
But you never for once called me anything other than my real name.

You claim to dislike me and my attitude, but deep down you just want to understand why I am like this.

I already told you I am a stage 4 lung cancer patient and I cherished every second I breathed in air.
Do not beat yourself up for not taking closer looks at me to realize I was actually sick.

It's not your fault. I never spoke much because it was hard enough to breath without the aid of a tube.

I was always away on weekends to give those sacks to someone who needed them at the hospital and then have my appointments with the doctor afterwards.

I never let you do anything for me because I didn't want you to stumble upon any of my medications or documents as a patient.

I am in pains girl.
And I can't take it anymore.
I don't know how I survived this long, but I am grateful for it.

You once asked me about the things I loved and also requested that I asked you questions just so we could flow.
I'm sorry you're getting my answers after I've been buried six feet below the surface.

I love to write.
I love to binge watch movies on Netflix.
I have a cat at home named Shine.
I read a lot of novels so I tend to daydream a lot.
I wonder if you prefer Kdramas to Bollywood movies.
Do you like fair skinned guys or dark ones?
Guys with beards or guys that shave?
Yogurt or Ice-cream?
Barbie or Sophia?
Moana or Aladdin?
Would you rather wear heels.